It's pretty easy to play the comparison game because there is always someone better/more qualified/prettier/younger/wiser/more correct/at peace... Always. At some point you need to take a deep breath and let that all go. It's you v. you and the only obstacles are complacency & distraction from your big picture.
How to avoid those distractions? Umm I dunno?!?! But recently (and after some catastrophically dumb decisions) I made the conscious decision to *try to* avoid toxic connections, I guess I was drawn to them for excitement to escape boredom. Some examples:
- the girl that slept with athletes
- the drug dealer guy
- the married guy (found out after/during the fact when she walked in)
- the girl who was paranoid
- the loudmouth funny rude guy
- the depressed girl
- etc.
- etc.
- etc.
As with any lifestyle change it's felt unnatural at times on top of a pretty ongoing level of second-guessing, but ultimately not without some seriously awesome benefits.
- Give up disaster guys? End up dating a thoughtful & sweet guy who keeps me smiling
- Take a step back from *the scene*? Discover some awesome people who were already over it that are already in my life
- Decide when enough is enough in a work environment that wasn't working anymore? Get a call from my dream job within hours
- (this may seem stupid but it has parallels in my mind) When Olive was sick again a few weeks ago, the vet urged a ton of extensive extra tests ($$$), I pulled myself back a bit mentally and told her I would monitor Olive but that we weren't going that route... Olive rebounded in a couple days, and if she is dying she is pretty frisky and stoked about it
All this being said, I've made my mistakes and some people have walked away from me for the right reasons, but at the end of the day (as in this day, right here, right now) I am calm and happy and excited about the direction things are going in. Oh and by the wayyyy now that I have that work/life balance that I was dying for I have time for important things, like painting my nails, yeah that's right 2 sizes of sparkles&dark plum in 1 polish (Scandalous/Revlon) ::
“A woman's past is either scandalously indecent or shamefully uninteresting” - anonymous
Anyways Lulu- you are on the money.
Posted by: Joe Battaglia | 29 December 2011 at 02:16